Phil Chwalinski

  • Oh, how I hear you. Been there. DT. GTTS. I was in warrior mode all the time. Always pissed off. And tired. If you don’t already have one, get a support system to keep you sane. Tell your story. Write a blog. Put it out there. It helps. They don’t like me at work either! LOL. I was the caregiver for my mom who had Alzheimer’s full time 4 years.…[Read more]

  • My mom just died on April 28, something I’ve been anticipating since I started this journey 5 years ago to care for her after her diagnosis with Alzheimer’s. She was done. She was tired and ready to go. Her quality of life was limited to either a wheel chair or bed after her hip broke. I watched her final decline for 2 weeks. I called Hospice to…[Read more]

  • Phil Chwalinski posted an update 1 year ago

    Pretending to care. Pretending to grieve. Pretending to live.
    Hello it’s me. I’m not done yet. Neither is mom.
    Her recent hospital visit caused by a very bad UTI where her catheter bag was filling up with what looked like tomato soup (caused by what? Lack of hydration/water?) I got the call at 5am from the nursing home that mom had blood ‘co…[Read more]

  • So sad, and so true. The people in charge of ‘oversight’ can’t manage the problem, but aren’t raising the red flag to help people, either. It’s simple: get volunteers in there to assist in daily care. Family members, or former caregivers who want to give back. Give family members a stipend’ for their time. Make it possible for them to keep caring…[Read more]

  • What you are doing is the best and only solution out there for us. Can’t stay home. Can’t get decent care in a nursing home without constant vigilance. Best wishes….

  • Don’t get me started (too late).
    They don’t look back 5 years for everybody. Ask first before you dig up so much history.
    This was such a difficult process which came too early in out plan which screwed us for the IRS. When the money is gone to apply for Medicaid how do you pay your taxes on the income you had to reduce? A sad mess.

  • Thank you for telling your story. When I was reading your list of things he can’t do anymore, I was saying to myself, ‘yes, but’, yes, but’…. but you knew that…. It must have been a big shock that day he went to the park and really didn’t come back. So sorry. My mother’s decline has been slower, but just as profound. I’m glad you are getting…[Read more]

  • Thank both for telling your story. It is so hard, I know from my experience as a family caregiver. Both my grandparents during the last part of their lives and my Mother now for 5 years. She has Alzheimer’s Disease. My story is here, as well. The question I keep thinking about and asking, when I read these stories is ‘ Why did you think you could…[Read more]

  • I thought this was going to be a political story, instead it’s another example of greedy people ‘in charge’. To say she is not a bad person is to say she is a good person. Which is it? It sounds like to me she doesn’t have a grasp of what it’s like to be one of the people taking her drug. And how is it possible that paying $2000 more is ever a good thing?

  • Thank you. If I have learned anything it is that you cannot do this alone, even if you have to accept less than perfect outcomes. There are no perfect solutions, so get yourself some help caring for your husband. I’ll be writing more soon.

  • This summer has been difficult, even more so, than when Mom was at home. She is in a new facility as of the middle of September (good), I worked full time hours in one job and part time hours in another, (good and bad) and my sister who has not been involved with my Mother’s healthcare petitioned the county court for guardianship (very bad). She…[Read more]

  • Reply timed out. What’s up with that? Some replies are long…. Thank you. Minimum care standards need to be raised for people with Alzheimer’s Disease. That is my platform for 2016.

  • Thank you for telling your story. When people are in our situation, there are no perfect solutions. You need to get help, either in home or in a facility. I had to look outside the county and consider a long commute to visit. even in a new facility as of September, she wants to come home, and I told her it was not safe for her and she would not…[Read more]

  • Denied. Apparently, they can’t add. It doesn’t matter that your bills exceed your finances. Really? Another appeal.

  • Thank you. There should be an easier roadmap for applying for Medicaid. It’s more like they don’t want you to get the assistance. Some very wrong here. And I’m going after it. I got nothing to loose. I already lost my mother to ALZ. She’s not dead yet, just not the same.

  • I’m working so much now that it give me little time to visit mom. I get to deal with the bad stuff, and have to let the good stuff fall to the side. I can’t take care of her and fight the battles too. At some point my health will take a hit,and then what? I’m not giving up. I’m not going away. I will not stop.

  • I hear you! Like I needed another battle to fight. I got enough already. Now it’s the ‘involuntary discharge’ battle with the nursing home (from a previous story). And then take on Medicaid again, and again, and again…. Not giving up. Not sitting down. Not shutting up. Not going away. Somebody will help me make a difference.

  • From POA to Guardianship
    As of yesterday at 2:55pm I have been appointed Guardian of my mother by a Judge in a court of law, and it wasn’t even my petition for Guardianship. It was my sister who petitioned the c […]

    • I hear you! Like I needed another battle to fight. I got enough already. Now it’s the ‘involuntary discharge’ battle with the nursing home (from a previous story). And then take on Medicaid again, and again, and again…. Not giving up. Not sitting down. Not shutting up. Not going away. Somebody will help me make a difference.

  • My life is so different than it was and still more different being a caregiver. Now I’m starting over getting back into the workforce. What I do is talk about my life and what is going on so my fellow employees know and understand. That transition time? Now I understand why I don’t listen to the radio in my car going to or coming from work. That’s…[Read more]

  • That is so funny! And important. I need to remember this when I’m old, wait a minute, I need that now!

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