Elder care

Eldercaregivers, introduce yourself here

This topic contains 5 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Heidilynn 3 months ago.

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  • #61032 Reply

    Cori Carl

    Let’s get the conversation going again! First things first — let’s introduce ourselves.

    I provide respite care for my grandmother, who has Alzheimer’s and has been on hospice for a little over a year now. She’s needed support for a long time, but it was a gradual process from helping out with things each week to needing 24/7 care. Now that I’m a flight away, I help out however I can and usually watch her for a couple weeks a year. Some Alz patients mellow out, but my grandmother is not an easy patient to care for. While she needs total care, she’s in fairly good health and has lucid moments. She keeps everyone on their toes.

  • #61676 Reply


    Glad to join the Group. My mother has lived with me for fifteen years. The first ten were swell; she could drive, she was active, she did the housekeeping while I worked and made dinner every night!. Five years ago she started showing signs of dementia. Gradually, dementia has taken hold. Now at 91, she is more like a four year old and my mother as I knew her is gone. She attends a senior day care four days a week, and twice a year I put her in respite care and take a trip alone to recharge. I have had to give up working, which is fine since I am 68 years old. But I am resentful that Mom’s care takes so much of my time! A job that I never wanted.

  • #63363 Reply

    Tena Scallan

    It is a pleasure to join the group. Here is a little information about myself. I worked in practically every department of a hospital for 6 years. Then, I was the administrative assistant at a Home Health agency for 7 years. Finally, starting and running my own homemaker/companion service with 26 incredible men and women for 12 years. We cared for people with all types of illnesses including Alzheimer’s

    I gave up my business because of the growing rules and regulations in caregiving. And decided to do something about it. I became a private caregiver to see what was lacking in the industry. I was able to have a fresh perspective on both sides of the fence. In the past 3 years, I have also cared for my father in law with severe Alzheimer’s. He passed away back in October. Now I am caring for my 90-year-old father, that was diagnosed with small cell neuroendocrine carcinoma bladder cancer. Being a family caregiver for your loved one is much different and emotional. I am happy to share my experience and past education. I have even started a small blog to offer information on things I have dealt with. http://www.theultimatecaregivingexpert.com

  • #64058 Reply


    I’m new to the forum and have some questions regarding dementia, please. My mother, 91, mostly blind, and living alone, overdosed on Ambien four months ago and has never been mentally “right” since. She now clearly has dementia – she gets her dreams and reality confused, is paranoid and angry, and confabulates (makes up plausible stories). She is no longer taking any psychiatric or sleep meds, though she was on Zoloft and then Seroquel, and Ativan, in the past in addition to the Ambien). I have an aide coming in three times a week for 4 hours, but my mother doesn’t want personal help (e.g., with bathing and eating), but only to have her apartment cleaned. She doesn’t leave her apartment and doesn’t cook, so I feel she’s not a danger to herself. My question is: if she is confused and/or confabulating, what do I do? Do I try to help her determine what’s real and what’s a dream? Do I explain to her she has cognitive problems (she denies having them and resents hearing that she has them) and that’s why she’s confused? Should I schedule more time for the aides to be in her house (even though she hates and resents them)? Should I find a nursing home for her? Should I just let her be? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

  • #64442 Reply

    Sadie Plank

    Hi everyone! I’m Sadie & I care for my mother full time now. I became an LVN after 10 years in construction. I thought it would be a good second half of life career & I wanted to understand my mom’s newly diagnosed lung disease….best decision ever. Much like one of the others above, it started out slow, a couple of days a week to help with shopping & what not. Then me & my husband would spend the night with her every other weekend & I would do her meds & made sure she had meals set up for her week that were easy to heat up. And now we live with mom (2 1/2 years now), & we are beginning the assessment process for her to be put on palliative care. Her desire is to be cared for in her home & of course dying in her sleep in her bed? My husband & I are committed to making as much of that a reality as we can. We use humor to deal with our stress & despite medical circumstances, we have a really great set up that allows moments of joy & the ability to zig & zag with the new “plot twists” that surface!

  • #66426 Reply


    Hi, I’m heidilynn. I take care of my boyfriend’s mother. I’ve done this for 5yrs now. She has COPD, diabetes and congestive heart failure. I’m 51yrs old in Indiana,isolated and no friends, want to reach out. Barbara is 82yrs old, 2 yrs ago it was good (still is good) she could walk without a walker and do things for herself. Her COPD has progressed and no longer is able to do much for herself 5 steps and she’s out of breathe. 24/7 oxygen.
    I enjoy doing for her and helping her stay home but it’s taking a toll on my relationship, he says “most guys worry about losing their girl to other guys, I lost mine to my mother). Thinking about it, it’s true. We don’t do much together anymore.

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