It’s rare for caregivers to have a free moment. The time consuming nature of caregiving means that few of us have the opportunity to get around to the things that are important to us.
So, what do you wish you had time for?
My husband. I am soul caregiver for my mother trying to keep her in her home and have made myself ill in this process. He is my only help and he is awesome above and beyond for me and my mom. – MH
All the things everyone thinks I have plenty of time for! Especially my own family. It’s infuriating. – SW
There is this thing that i hear people talk about all the time.. I think they call it.. Umm… Sleep? Yea. I think that’s it. Sleep. I’d like that it sounds nice!! – RG
An Encore Career. I never much liked what I did for a living, but it was easy, I seemed to be good at finding companies with good benefits, and I made *enough*. My last job had gotten more and more unpleasant so I took a buyout (which included a small severance payout, a year of career counseling, and the option to stay on their health insurance rolls for life). Almost simultaneously, my mother was diagnosed with bladder cancer. So I had to be able to take a weekday off with little notice whenever I needed to do that. After going to one full-time job interview, where HR told me I would only get 10 vacation days the first year and could not use them for 30 days, I opted for freelance copyediting at home. I didn’t need a job for health insurance, but – can anyone spell B.O.R.I.N.G?? After my mother died I now have found myself a full time care manager for my former domestic partner, whom I still love more than life itself, even though I live separately. *Fortunately* I was able to get her on Medicaid, so she gets 24 hour care. But I am running the show: supervising the aides, being her “voice” (she has dementia) with all care providers, handling paperwork and finances. Yes, I’m able to work enough hours to pay my bills (I now also get Social Security) but I hardly feel that I am making the most of my talents. Thankfully I *do* sing (I’m a church soloist) and write, but these seem like small things. Although I would not trade one day with my loved one for anything. – RM
A “guilt free” day that I could just enjoy the day no pain, no worries, just a day away from it all. – DG
My spouse. Our child must come 1st in both our lives, out of necessity. She is totally dependent on us for everything. She can’t even tell her caregiver that she needs a drink of water. Most people have no idea how blessed they really are. They let their burdens overshadow their blessings. If you or your loved one can communicate his or her needs then there is a lot to be thankful for. – RK
Stay in my bed watching tv ? resting!!! I suffer from fibromyalgia sometimes I feel I’m hitting the wall?? – GO
A day without worries, a day to myself without feeling guilty! – DH
A long, hot, uninterrupted bubble bath with a glass of wine and a candy corn scented candle burning. Ahhhhhhh… – DS
Myself. Doing something I would like to do for a change. – AJ
My other children, who often take a back seat. – JF
A life of my own for a change. – KM
A guilt free and anxiety free day to myself! I need me time so bad!! – LS
Vacation, away from work. Away from everything that’s stressing me out. – BJ
Just a bit of time together alone with the man who helps me the most with my son’s care. – DS
To have just one day where I can just pamper myself at a spa! – TS
I wish I had time to ride a bike and go swimming, just floating on my back in the pool. – CP
A haircut! – BJ
I live off of food from Trader Joe’s. I spend my life in a cubicle, a la Office Space. I’m kind of obsessed with the internet.
Confession: I take care of people but don’t identify as a caregiver.